whovian randomness
by Flying Cat In A Hoody
Summary: Random, unrelated and not-so-unrelated oneshots. mosty crack. I suck at summaries. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: this chapter is full of inside jokes, so I'll try my best to explain them...**

**the white cat is my character. We all got animals (or rather, were given animals by eachother) and I was the cat due to my inexplicably long nails and my habit of clawing people with them. And hissing at them. *cough*. I was given the name 'hoody cat' (I wore a hoody every day. Really, **_**every day.**_**)**** Due to an incident in health class, the hoody cat was given the power to fly. Three of us got super powers. From there on, I was known as 'flying cat in a hoody' and the cat here is based off of her, or me. Without the hoody. Or the flying... also, I flip out whenever somebody hugs me, 'cuz I don't like physical contact, so that's why I tried to kill the Doctor. Just sayin'.**

**Knife** **throwing club is a thing that the invisible dog (Nik) and I have, so yeah...**

**operation 1 is a thing between dog and I, and banana 'cuz of the doctor, 4 'cuz I felt like it, usually relates to pain or death, .cookie1 is 'cuz our organization is called C.O.O.K.I.E (Clan Of Overly (not)Nice Ice cream Eaters) and I needed a number there.**

**That is all.**

the doctor frowned at the TARDIS. It shouldn't be making that noise, he wasn't landing it. Still, here he was, so something obviously wanted him here. He stepped outside...

the writer sat on the bench with her low-quality laptop, thinking of the contents of the next chapter. Should the Doctor discover fanfiction? Ooh, that should be interesting. Or, maybe a dalek should give the Doctor dating advice. Suddenly the familiar _vwoorp _of the TARDIS drew her attention from the screen. She ran to the source of the sound, and watched as the doors opened slowly...

there was a girl, about 14 with dark red hair and a shirt with a TARDIS on it. His TARDIS. She had a evil grin plastered on her face, and he was about to retreat into his ship when-

"Oh, hello, Doctor. Hows life? 10th regeneration, no companion, by the looks of it... have you done the whole meta-crisis thing yet?

"um... what?"

"OK then, a simple 'no' would've suffice."

"how did you..."

she stared at him intently, trying to pinpoint where he was in his time line.

"let me see the screwdriver."

he handed it over reluctantly, mostly out of fear. Something told him not to mess with this girl.

"So, after Rose..."

He flinched at the sound of Rose's name. He had only just dropped seen her on the beach, and he still felt bad...

She sensed his discomfort.

"yeah, definitely after Rose. Wow, really early, then. You're still young. Well, young by your standards. Can I come in?"

she pushed past him, stepping into the console room of the TARDIS.

"Doctor, do you have any bananas? I'm hungry."

"But-"

"I'll be in the kitchen."

a white cat followed her down the hall, pausing only to glare at the time lord.

"er... nice kitty..."

He reached down to pat the top of the cat's head...

The doctor walked in several minuets later, five long scratches bleeding on his arm.

"what happened?"

"Your cat happened."

the cat mewed innocently.

"what'd you do?"

"nothing! I was just petting it, and-"

"PETTING IT? Why'd you go and do that? It's a wonder you got away with only a few scratches. Last time somebody tried that... well, lets not talk about that. Keep your hands off my cat!"

the Doctor just stared at her.

"Anyway, I've gotta go. Knife throwing club starts in..."

she looked at her watch.

"...Five minuets. And yes, Doctor, I know that we're in a time machine. But with the TARDIS... well, last time, five minuets turned into twelve years... you really have to work on that, do you know how rude you were? Er, sorry, hasn't happened yet... gosh, time travel can be annoying... That reminds me! I need to tell Nik about this... operation 1 is a success!"

"Operation... what?"

"Oh, shush, nobody wants to hear you talk."

and with that, she walked out of the TARDIS, humming the doctor who theme song.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, 31 people who read the last chapter. Due to a lot of prior planning, I have quite a few chapters stored in this little laptop of mine (it really is a crappy laptop, but it works, so I deal with it.) so I can afford to post one today. Also, this is really short. And full of continuity errors. But you know what? I don't care! I haven't really worked out a posting schedule yet, so yeah. I'll post when I feel like it. I would like to thank bigapplecat, Rwy'n-blaidd-Drwg, and shinepool of Bramblaclan for following this story, and Rwy'n-blaidd-Drwg for favoriting it. **

"I don't understand why you're making such a big deal out of this!"

"What in the name of sanity have you got on your head?"

"It's called a fez!"

"It's hideous!"

"I like fezzes. Fezzes are-"

"No. Fezzes are not cool."

" Why'd you have to go and blow it up?"

"Trust me, Doctor, I'm doing you a favor!"

"What do you have against fezzes?"

"Spoilers..."


End file.
